


Love You, Love Me

by Emerson_Ryan



Series: The Northwick Letters [1]
Category: British Actor RPF, Tom Hiddleston - Fandom
Genre: Adult Content, Angst, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Mild Language, Multi, Past Domestic Violence, Professor Tom, Romance, Sexual Content, Stalking, alcohol reference, prof!tom
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-19
Updated: 2015-08-07
Packaged: 2018-04-10 02:31:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 16,438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4373813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emerson_Ryan/pseuds/Emerson_Ryan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thomas Hiddleston was looking for a change so when a teaching opportunity became available to him he packed up his life and moved thousands of miles from home to the coastal town of Northwick, Washington, and though he's never stepped foot in it a day in his life, through letters from an old friend he knows of its beauty and the potential for it to be exactly everything he's hoping for.</p><p>Elliana Sawyer is a busy single mother and business owner who has fought for years to get over a painful chapter in her life, so imagine her surprise when an old friend shows up seemingly out of nowhere, threatening to open old wounds but more so offer a hope she isn't sure she believes in.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Hello, Old Friend

**Author's Note:**

> Hello and welcome to my new series! A few things straight away.
> 
> 1\. This is an AU where Tom is not an actor but is a Professor (Professor of Shakespearean Studies to be precise)  
> 2\. The story is set in 2011.  
> 3\. The story will be touching on some sensitive matters and when those chapters come up I will trigger warn for those out there who wish not to read.  
> 4\. And lastly if anyone is reading this because they've read and/or are reading my Witchcastle Series have no fear I won't be abandoning that series anytime soon.
> 
> I decided to finally post this story because well I wrote the first chapter nearly a year ago and just kind of sat on it. Only one other person has read this chapter (before I did some heavy editing) and she is a dear, dear friend of mine who encouraged me to post it so here we are. To anyone who happen to stumble upon my little corner of fiction land I truly hope you enjoy your stay.

 

_“Finding an old friend is like finding a lost treasure.”-Unknown_

It should stand to reason that he would give just about anything to find himself in bed sleeping off the jet lag that may overcome him any moment now, but the three hour drive from SeaTac International Airport to his new home on the coast of Washington has put a surprising spring in his step, or maybe it was the coffee that did it.

No matter the cause, excitement fills him as the sky begins to lighten, and he follows the directions given to him from a kindly petrol station clerk and starts up the winding highway leading to Cape Orcas.

It’s even more beautiful than he ever imagined.

Pulling to the side of the road it’s a mad scramble to unhook his seat belt and get out of the car and once he does he embraces the cool ocean breeze that rolls up the rocks of the overlook, lifting a beautifully structured face to the sky. He’s always loved the sea, so when the opportunity to work in a coastal town presented itself he took it without a second thought.

London will always be Tom’s home, but the college town of Northwick situated at the very tip of Cape Orcas is already proving to be nearly as good, and because he can think of nothing better to do he sits himself down on the bench nearby and stares out at the ocean losing himself to the seemingly endless opportunities that are ahead of him.

**-XX-**

His legs eat up the sidewalk in lazy strides as he takes in all that Northwick has to offer. For a college town it seems quaint, laid back, friendly even as he’s already lost count of how many times this early morning someone has taken the time to call out a _‘hello,’_ or to offer wave and smile. It is refreshing and wonderful and strangely alien all at once.

He pauses for a moment taking in the beautiful pastries on display behind the sparkling glass windows of a shop that boasts the name Heaven Scent Bakery and Bistro, and when his stomach gives a mild grumble he makes a mental note to be sure to stop in and make himself acquainted with some sweets just as soon as he gets himself settled into his rental.

 

**_::Elli::_ **

 

“Here we go pretty girl,” I say in a sing-song voice as I lift Luci onto a stool and she giggles happily clapping her hands as she plucks a grape off her plate, popping it into her mouth.

“Thanks Momma,” Luci says as I brush a kiss over her soft brown hair and taking a moment I revel in the citrus scent of her shampoo.

“Anytime lady bug, now you stay here and eat up all your breakfast and if you finish you just might get a cookie for snack,” I say sending her a playful wink before walking back behind the counter just in time for the door to jingle open.

“Nana!” Luci’s sweet little voice calls out excitedly as Tessa, basket in hand, sweeps Luci up in her arms swinging her around garnering a fresh wave of melodic giggles.

“There’s my best girl, what do you have here? Smiley face pancakes, your Momma is spoiling you isn’t she baby girl?” Tessa asks and Luci nods her head before happily turning her attention back to her food, “and there’s my other best girl, Elliana how are you doing sweetheart?”

“I’m good. Just soaking up as many days with Luci before she starts school,” I say my hands working carefully on the box of sweets that Tessa asked me to make up for the tenant moving in today, “how are you and Dad? Did you try out that summer squash soup I left for you last night?”

“We did and it was wonderful. We fought over the last bite,” she says as she slips behind the counter to get a closer look at what I’m doing, “that looks amazing Elli. Our newest resident will love it.”

“I hope so. Everyone is curious about the new professor,” I say nestling in the last chocolate chunk cookie and deciding I’ve packed enough into the powder blue box I close the lid and humming softly tie Heaven Scent’s signature twine bow before passing it off to Tessa’s waiting hands, “be sure and tell our newcomer where these came from and that they are always welcome to come back for more.”

“I will, oh and your Dad wanted me to remind you about this weekend. We get lady bug Luci for two whole days,” she says brushing a kiss to my cheek before sweeping back around the counter to love on Luci who giggles and offers a half-eaten apple slice to her.

“Luciana Grace, you eat that apple,” I say garnishing a quick squeak of laughter as she pops it in her mouth.

“Well I am off to greet the newest Northwickian, you two girls behave,” Tessa says as she gathers the basket of goodies up in her arms, the powder blue box of desserts on the very top.

“We make no promises,” I call to her and with a final wave I watch as she sashays through the door and down the street with a shake of my head.

 At almost fifty five Theresa Mason-Sawyer, Tessa to friends and family; is like a whirlwind in a bottle, and I love every bit of her. After all she managed to win over my Dad’s heart when I thought he’d never love again, and in doing so has forever cemented her place on my favorite people’s list. I shake my head at the thought and because my mother’s intuition warns me I manage to catch Luci trying to sneak the remaining fruit into her napkin, but just barely.

**_-Tom-_ **

 

Tom found the note stuck to the front door of his temporary home which instructed him that the key was under the mat and that someone by the name of Theresa would be by sometime after nine thirty to do a walk through with him but in the meantime he is more than welcome to have a look through should he be so inclined. It amazes him really, the amount of trust that was afforded, but because the curiosity over his new home was almost more than he could understand he finds the silver key and slides it into the lock.

The front entrance is cozy with a staircase on his immediate right leading to the second floor, but what catches him by the throat is the pristine condition in which he finds everything. He had chosen this residence over all the ones suggested through the university because it claimed to be one of the oldest buildings in Northwick, and from what he can see it’s true.

Long fingers dance over the shining banister as he makes his way upstairs and he finds an impressive master suite and bathroom, along with a small guest room which will come in handy should his mum or sisters ever decide to come and visit.

“Hello?” a voice wafts up from the lower level and suddenly his stomach is a mass of nerves as he descends the stairs to find a fiery red head settling a large basket on top of his kitchen counter.

“You must be Theresa,” Tom says with a quick smile as he offers his hand and she takes it mirroring his bright smile.

“The one and only, and you must be Thomas,” she says and he nods his eyes flickering over to the basket, “I come bearing gifts.”

“That is incredibly thoughtful of you,” he says and when she lifts a powder blue box from the top a magical scent greets him, “and it’s Tom please.”

“Then Tom it is. I hope your flight and drive went well,” the woman says as she helps herself to unpacking the basket and he takes the time to sit back and watch her. She moves quickly and expertly and for some strange reason he feels like he’s seen her before and because she talks a mile a minute he finds himself searching his memory trying to place her, “I don’t know how much you’ve looked around but the house comes fully furnished as stated in the lease agreement.”

He leans against the counter resting on his forearms offering a hum of understanding as he studies her business card and then it clicks into place and he can’t help himself as he claps loudly a broad grin forming on his lips.

“Tessa Sawyer! I know you, or rather know of you,” Tom exclaims happily causing Tessa to jump slightly.

“I should hope so since you’re renting a home from me,” she says jokingly as she shakes a tumble of hair from her shoulders.

“I knew your step-daughter,” he says in a rush and for a second he wonders if he’s thoroughly frightened the woman by the way she goes stock still and turns slowly around to meet his cheerful gaze.

“You know Elliana?” she asks slowly but rather than waiting for a response she rushes to her shoulder bag pulling the manila folder from within, and opening it shrewd green eyes dance over the page. She sets the folder down on the counter and settles humor filled eyes on him, “Well, well, well. What a small world.”

 

**_::Elli::_ **

****

I hum softly as I wash the last of the lunch dishes happy to find myself alone even if it’s only for as long as it takes to load the dishwasher. I’ll take any lull that I can at this point. I’ve been wrestling with warring emotions for the better part of a month, excitement for Luci starting the grand adventure that is kindergarten and heart break at the thought that my little girl seems to be growing up too fast. It seems like an eye blink ago I was getting up for two a.m. feedings and now she’s five and a half and full of wonder.

Taking a quick glance through the door leading into the shop I find Luci coloring happily and decide to quickly excuse myself to the restroom so I can collect myself and when I close the door behind me and the first hot tear rolls down my cheek I swear this will be the last time that I cry, this week at least.

I’m making progress in wiping away the evidence of my tears when a soft knock comes to the door and clearing my throat I turn and swing it open.

“Hey sweet pea,” Dad’s voice fills the distance between us and I smile hugging him close, “are you okay?”

“Yeah,” I murmur against his broad chest, “just having a moment.”

“You seem to be having a lot of those these days,” he says leaning back to study my face. His smile is small but the lines creasing his forehead show his worry.

“My little girl is growing up,” I say with a shaky smile and he pulls me in close again resting his head against mine as he rumbles with a soft chuckle.

“I know the feeling,” he says and I’m content to let him just hold me and chase away the ache a way only a Dad can.

 

**XX**

“There he goes again,” Miya says pulling my attention from the tray of lemon bars I was arranging and I catch a flash of dark red hair as the stranger passes by.

“He’s probably a tourist Miya,” I say turning my attention back to the task at hand, “we’re going to be up to our eyeballs in them through the holiday weekend, you know that.”

“Then may we thank the tour season gods for offering to us such a fine male specimen,” she says with a flick of the towel in her hand and I giggle shaking my head. Miya is a Texas transplant who has sass by the bucket full and a heart of pure gold.

“And how would you know what he looks like?” I ask and she smiles sheepishly as she shrugs a slim shoulder.

“I may have busied myself with cleaning the front windows for a few minutes when he just so happened to be walking by a little bit ago,” she confesses with a gleam in her hazel eyes and I can’t help but shake my head.

“Of course you did, so spill, tell me about this tour season offering that has been so graciously bestowed upon us,” I say and before I can blink she’s hopping up on the counter bouncing excitedly.

“He’s tall, a little on the slim side for my liking, but it’s his face. My-oh-my that face. He has cheekbones that can cut glass, and you know me I usually don’t like a man with facial hair but the way he wears it…mmm, mmm, mmm,”  she gushes dramatically fanning her dark skin.

“What about his eyes?” I ask closing the display case slowly, “you know me, I like eyes.”

“Didn’t get a look at them, they were hidden behind his Ray-Ban’s.”

“That’s too bad,” I murmur and she laughs slipping off the counter untying her apron, “I’ll see you tomorrow. Oh hey did you get your books for class already?”

“Sure did. I’ve got a light load this semester. Only class I’m dreading is Shakespearean Studies,” she says with a twinge of worry in her voice.

“You remember what I said, if you need to rearrange your schedule or anything you just let me know, and don’t forget to take advantage of the tutoring program,” I say and she smiles before wrapping me in a tight hug.

“I know Elli, thank you. Okay I’m off, oh and don’t forget about the barbecue tonight,” she says and I nod shooing her out.

“Believe me Tessa’s grilling up her chicken I won’t forget and be sure to bring a sweater, the nights are getting cooler,” I call after her as she steps into the late afternoon sunshine.

 

**XX**

I manage to usher the last of the regulars through the door just shy of seven and with a final wave good bye I let myself enjoy the feeling of another successful day. My little bakery and bistro has come a long way from the early days when I was almost certain it would never work, but with a little faith and a whole lot of support from my family I’ve managed to make something of myself, or at least I like to think I have. Sighing softly and pressing a fist to my lower back I fall into the repetition of my closing up routine.

Halfway through stacking chairs on tables I hear the bell over the door chime softly and the smile curves my lips as I turn expecting to find Dad and Luci but instead the air is knocked from my lungs as I recognize the man before me.

He’s changed over the years but I’d recognize him anywhere, I had after all spent nearly seven years committing his face to memory. His once golden curls are now a rich red that tease the nape of his neck curling flirtatiously around his ears, and his eyes, those incredible blue-green eyes shine under the hanging lights.

“Tom?” his name is a question that rolls from my lips and in answer he closes the space between us and before I can ask him what in the world he’s doing here in Northwick of all places he’s scooping me up in a hug that lifts my feet off the floor. My arms circle his neck instinctively as he holds me tight and for a second I wonder if this all simply a dream. After all it isn’t every day that an old pen pal and best friend just simply waltzes back into one’s life, especially mine.

“Elliana,” he murmurs my name once he settles me back on my feet, his hands coming to rest warmly on my shoulders, “I thought for sure you would have been in New York still, taking big city business by storm. It’s taken me all afternoon to work up the courage to come in here and see you, but I just had to, especially after making the connection with Tessa…”

His words are rushed and excited and all I can do is stare at him, stuck somewhere between undeniable joy to find him here and pain at the memory of how things fell apart.

“How-why-when?” I stammer unable to make any sort of sense but before any answers can be given the door chimes open again interrupting us.

“Momma!” Luci’s voice fills the tense air between us and ignoring the sudden urge I have to cry I fix a smile to my face and lift her up onto my hip unable to miss the look of bewilderment on Tom’s face.


	2. Untold History

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Elli and Tom take their first shaky steps towards facing their shared history.

 

_“Some things are best left unsaid.”-Unknown_

**_~XX~_ **

 

I set Luci down and because I can see the cautious curiosity shining in her hazel eyes I crouch down beside her taking her hand in mine.

“Luci this is Tom, he used to be a very good friend of mine,” I tell her and without a thought Tom mirrors our position and extends his hand to Luci.

“It’s very nice to meet you Luci, you are very pretty,” Tom says and after a moment of careful consideration Luci takes his hand her widening as he presses a soft kiss to her skin.

“You sound funny…” Luci’s voice fills the air drawing a chuckle from Tom.

“Luciana that isn’t nice,” I gently chide her.

“She’s right I do sound funny but that’s because I’m from somewhere far, far away. Do you know where London is?” Tom asks his voice surprisingly gentle as he speaks to my daughter.

“Mmm no,” Luci replies shaking her head slowly back and forth.

“Hmm well if you fly for many, many hours over the ocean you will come upon it, and we all sound like this over there.”

“Over the ocean?” Luci’s voice is filled with wonder only a child’s voice can carry, “I’ve never been on a plane…Momma says maybe someday we’ll take one to Disneyland.”

“Hey Luci why don’t you go find Lolli while I finish talking to Tom,” I say easing her in the direction of her faithful stuffed purple hippo, “sorry once she gets started on Disneyland she’ll talk your ear off.” I hear someone clear their throat and remember with some embarrassment that my dad stands behind me still, “right sorry, Dad this is Tom, Tom my dad…”

“Mr. Sawyer,” Tom straightens and extends his hand forward and my dad gives a small shake of his head as he grins and shakes his hand.

“You can call me Mitchell, you aren’t a teenager asking for my permission to write to my daughter anymore Tom. I’m going to let you two catch up, I better be heading home to help Tessa with the barbecue preparation, say Tom you should come tonight. No one can grill chicken like my Tessa.”

“Dad I’m sure Tom would like to get settled in tonight.”

“Actually Tessa already extended an invitation that I was more than happy to accept.”

“How about that. Elli why don’t you walk Tom over once you’ve finished up here. Hey Lady Bug Luci want to come with me?” and before I can say anything my dad and Luci are waving good bye and disappearing down the sidewalk.

 

The silence is thick as I finish closing down the shop while Tom studies the books lining the shelves.

“You have an eclectic collection here Elliana,” Tom says smiling as I slip into a light sweater.

“I try,” I murmur as he opens the door for me, and stepping out I’m thankful for the fresh air, “I just have to lock up.” I rummage through my purse for my keys and find myself frustrated by the way my hands shake and taking a deep breath I manage to still them and lock the door.

“Shall we?” Tom asks offering his arm and I study him for a moment and deciding it best to just go along with it I tuck my hand in the crook of his elbow and lead the way.

 

**~XX~**

The walk is quiet and blessedly quick and the moment we pass through the open gate and into Dad and Tessa’s backyard I slide my hand from Tom’s arm.

“I’m going to get a drink would you like something?” I ask and before he can respond Miya approaches like a whirlwind.

“There you are! I’ve just heard from Tessa that you already know the new professor, and that you have a history with him? Why am I just finding out about this?” Miya questions me quickly completely oblivious to Tom and I feel the blush creeping into my face.

“Miya,” I mutter causing a chuckle to bubble from Tom’s lips which in turn draws Miya’s attention, “I’m going to get a drink, I’ll leave you two to introductions.”

**~XX~**

“So Elli when was the last time you saw Tom?” Miya’s voice carries over every conversation being held around the crowded table causing the air to grow silent, and I can’t help but look at Tom who sits across from me. I search his face wondering if he remembers that night as well as I do but I can’t read him. Not the way I used to at least.

“The last time I saw Tom was in New York on my twenty first birthday.” I say picking up my wine glass with the hopes that if my hands are busy my voice won’t shake from the memory. Tom holds my gaze and I can tell he’s trying to figure out if I’m going to divulge everything that happened that far away night. “Sad to say my twenty first was rather boring compared to most. Miya, can I see you for a moment.”

I push away from the table fully aware of the hush that has fallen over everyone but by the time I’m in the kitchen Tessa is rousing everyone back into conversation.

“He sure is cute Elli.” Miya jokes her voice trailing off when I take her by the hand and drag her further into the house until I feel we’re at a safe distance so as not to be overheard. “Elli what the hell is the matter with you?”

“You need to stop. Stop asking questions about how Tom and I know each other, or how long we’ve known each other, or when we last saw each other,” my words come out harsher than I intend but I can’t help the emotions that his presence and Miya’s constant questioning have dredged up.

“Oh come on Elli I’m just giving you a hard time…”

“Well it stops. Now. If I decide to share that particularly messy part of my past with you I will but until then it would be greatly appreciated if you just butt the hell out.”

“Wow okay, I’m sorry, I never meant any harm…” the sincerity in her voice is genuine and serves to drive a quick spurt of guilt through me and I take a deep breath trying to level myself back out again and when she hugs me I take what comfort I can.

**~XX~**

The flames of the fire pit flicker sending embers dancing into the darkness as people mill about branched off in groups talking amongst themselves and while I listen to Tessa talk about the upcoming music festival I keep catching Tom’s eyes on me. There are so many questions I want to ask. So many things left unsaid for so many years but I can’t seem to make the thoughts go from my brain to my lips; all I can do is watch him as he watches me and wonder if he’s thinking the same things as me.

“Momma,” Luci’s voice pulls my eyes away from Tom and I smile as she stands before me in one of my Dad’s white t-shirts rubbing a hand over her eyes.

“Come here lady bug,” I murmur and that is all the invitation my little Luci needs before she is scrambling into my lap. She wraps an arm around my neck her fingers finding my hair while she snuggles her head on my chest and by the time I look down her eyes are drooping closed.

“Elli let me take her, we’ll lay her down upstairs,” Dad offers and I shake my head.

“That’s okay Dad we should really get home,” I say slowly moving and Luci stirs in my lap I wince slightly.

“What are you going to do, carry her there?” he asks as he crouches down beside my chair. “Let us take her a night early.”

“Are you sure?” I ask and in answer he brushes a kiss to my forehead before gathering Luci in his arms. I watch as he walks away with her and I can’t help but think of how she looks like a little doll in my Dad’s gentle arms, and how I remember the days he carried me to bed when the day’s fun wore me out.

 

**-Tom-**

He’s tried his hardest all night to stay engaged in the conversations going on around him but inevitably he finds his attention falling on Elli. He noticed the flash of panic in her eyes when Miya began to ask questions regarding him and because of that he didn’t rush to answer any. Instead he remained silent as she pulled Miya aside most certainly to inform her that it really is none of her business what the history is between himself and Elli.

Because that is precisely what it is.

Incredibly messy and painfully unfinished history but history nonetheless.

However he finds himself completely charmed by Luci and all of her wide eyed innocence and with curiosity he watches as the little girl with the angel smile curls into her mother’s lap almost instantly falling asleep.

“Tom,” Tessa’s voice drifts through his head and he has to force himself to look away from the picture that Elli and Luci make.

“I’m sorry, what were you saying?” Tom asks feeling like an ass for having gotten so distracted that he doesn’t know what his lovely host was saying to him.

“I was saying that the weekend after next is the music festival and you really haven’t lived until you’ve been,” Tessa says giving him a soft smile but something in her eyes shines and tells him that she’s onto him.

“That sounds lovely,” he states forcing himself to stay within the conversation this time around.

 

**~XX~**

He carries a stack of dishes into the open and airy kitchen trying to hide the fact that he’s looking for Elli.

“She slipped out about five minutes ago,” Miya says from the sink where she’s elbow deep in sudsy water.

“Pardon?” he asks unconvincingly.

“Judging by the look on your face, you’re trying to search Elli out without being obvious, so I thought being the sweet and thoughtful girl that I am that I would let you know that she slipped out about five minutes ago.”

“Oh, uh, thanks,” he says trying to decide how he should feel that a future student should be so entangled in his personal affairs and as he turns to leave she speaks up again.

“She likes to walk the beach on the nights she doesn’t have Luci. Good luck.”

**~XX~**

He finds Elli rather easily and for a moment he just studies her. She stands with her arms wrapped around herself and though he wants to approach her he thinks better of it. The questions that he has for her seem endless as they circle in his head but something tells him that if he were to ask them now the answers he’d receive would not be enough to satisfy.

So with the sound of waves breaking against the shore he leaves her to her own thoughts deciding he’s been patient for six years, what’s another day?

 

**_::Elli::_ **

****

_‘Elli,_

_I know that I should feel guilt for what happened, but I don’t._

_Perhaps it was wrong._

_I know it was wrong._

_But it doesn’t change the way that I feel about you, the way I’ve felt about you for longer than I care to admit, and I think if you’re honest with yourself even if just for a moment you could admit that you feel it too._

_I don’t know, maybe I’m completely wrong about this. If I am then please disregard this letter and tell me we can at least still be friends._

_I couldn’t bear it if I lost you._

_Love you,_

_Love me.’_

I read the words over and over again familiar feelings rushing to the surface and I wonder what the hell I’m supposed to do now.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello Lovelies,
> 
> A big thank you to the people who have already left me kudos. I was shocked when I saw that I already had a response, I honestly thought it would be a while before this story was even really noticed, but with that said it makes my heart super happy to see it! I hope that this chapter doesn't disappoint.
> 
> All my love and squishy hugs,
> 
> EM
> 
> p.s. oh-twhiddleston-my-twhiddleston.tumblr.com (come visit me, lets be friends!)
> 
> Music Muse(s)
> 
> Crazy for You-Scars on 45


	3. I've Missed You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A night on the beach opens the door to the past.

_“Missing you comes in waves and tonight I’m drowning.”-Unknown_

****

The weekend passes slowly like they always do when Luci is off having adventures with Dad and Tessa, even with the surge of tourists streaming in and out most of the day I find my mind wandering. It doesn’t help that Tom has been in at least twice since the barbecue. He doesn’t say much, not that I expect him too, we don’t know each other after all. Not anymore. Yet each time I see him he offers a soft smile and all I can do is smile back.

I want to talk to him, much like I’ve wanted to talk to him over the years that have passed since the last time we spoke but the words get lost somewhere.

“Hey, any exciting plans for your Saturday?” Miya asks as she carries a tray of fresh cookies in from the kitchen.

“Mmm unless you call a date with a glass of wine and Netflix exciting, no,” I say smiling as we work in tandem to restock before the last rush of the evening begins.

“Tonight’s the last night for movies on the beach, you should really come. You know your dad and Tessa will be bringing Luci,” she says sliding the display closed, “and I have it on good authority that Tom will be there.”

“And how would you know that? Keeping tabs on your professor Miya?” I ask and to Miya’s credit all she does is shrug her shoulders. I know she doesn’t mean harm, she is after all a romantic at heart, I just wish she’d understand that this thing with Tom is so much more complicated then it may seem. “I’ll think about it okay, but I make no promises.”

 

**_~XX~_ **

 

Evening has started to settle in and I find myself alone again having let Miya go early so she could meet with some of her friends for the movie, and because it looks like no one else will be in I decide to treat myself to dinner. I settle into my favorite corner booth and just before I can take a bite the door opens and Luci bullets inside waving Lolli excitedly about.

“Momma!” her sweet voice fills the air as she launches herself into my arms.

“Hi baby what are you doing here? Where’s Nana and Papa?” but before she can begin to explain Dad and Tessa stroll in arm and arm with Tom behind them.

“Hope you don’t mind the visit. We thought we’d see if you were done for the evening so you could join us for the last movie of the season,” Tessa says her smile almost bright enough to hide the flicker of mischief in her eyes…almost.

“Well that is a very lovely offer but I have plans tonight,” I say setting Luci down and with amazement I watch as she walks to Tom clambering for his attention and as if he’s been doing it all her life he kneels down to talk to her. They whisper among themselves like they are old friends.

“Come now Elli you’ve worked enough for the day, take in a movie with us,” Dad insists but I shake my head.

“I have to close up still, and I planned on…”

“Having a glass of wine and watching Netflix we know Miya told us.”

“Oh she did, did she?” I ask but deep down I’m not at all surprised.

“Now you know she meant no harm.” Dad says as he wraps an arm lovingly around my shoulders. “Besides the movie tonight is The Wizard of Oz, your favorite.”

“Dad come on you know that if I could…”

“We’ll help you close up.”

Just like that the decision is taken from my hands as Tessa in the way only Tessa can gets everyone moving, even Luci, who more than happily accepts the rag held out to her and sets to wiping down tables.

**_~XX~_ **

“Miya’s saved us a spot I see,” I say and the look passed between Dad and Tessa does not go unnoticed.

“How about that. Luci why don’t you go say hi to Miya,” I say and without a second of hesitation she runs off to do just that. “Tessa, a word.” I take Tessa by the arm so we fall behind Dad and Tom.

“Yes dear,” Tessa’s voice is light as I stare at her.

“I know what you are all up to,” I mutter trying hard to keep my voice down so Tom doesn’t over hear us.

“I’m afraid that I don’t know what you’re talking about,” but the smile on her lips tells me otherwise.

“Okay look I appreciate what you guys are trying to do, but please, stop trying to force this okay?”

“I wouldn’t have to meddle if the two of you didn’t move slower than an ant in molasses,” she says and I roll my eyes giving my head a quick shake.

“It’s complicated Tessa, more complicated then you know so please, just enough.” I don’t know why I’m so emotional and the utter embarrassment I feel because of the tears that fill my eyes is more than enough to make me want to bury my head in the sand until I can handle whatever it is that is going on with me.

“Sweetie I had no idea, I’m sorry,” she says wrapping me in a hug, “but we will have to talk about this, eventually.”

“We will I promise just not yet.”

 

**-Tom-**

**_~XX~_ **

He tries his best to pay attention to the movie, not that he really has too. He’s seen it a million times thanks to two sisters who absolutely loved the film growing up, but he can’t help his eyes from wandering over to Elli. She looks incredibly relaxed sitting beside him with Luci snuggled in her lap their eyes the perfect mirror image of one another as they watch, and every once in a while Elli whispers in her ear drawing a soft giggle from the little girl.

“The movie’s not that way,” Tessa’s voice is soft in his ear and he smiles turning his attention back to the screen.

“Am I that transparent?” he asks taking a handful of popcorn from the bowl Tessa offers him and in response all Tessa offers is a soft laugh.

 

The credits roll and with it people begin to make their way off the beach, and as he brushes sand from his hands he watches Elli shake out the blanket she was sitting on while laughing and talking to Miya and Tessa and the pang of jealousy comes quick. There was a time when they would laugh and talk like that, of course it only ever happened in person once, but he can remember hours of conversations happening online and countless letters…

“We’ll see you tomorrow night Elli. Come along Ladybug, time for a bubble bath,” Tessa says taking Luci by the hand, “Miya why don’t we walk you home?”

“I’d like that, bye Elli see you Monday.”

His eyes catch Elli’s for just a second before she starts to walk past him and he catches the scent of her perfume as she brushes his arm gently on her way.

“I’ve missed you,” the words are out of his mouth before he can stop them.

 

**_::Elli::_ **

**_~XX~_ **

Tom’s words hang in the air between us and I find myself unable to move; not to turn and say something back to him, not even to keep walking. I’m frozen. My brain sends the command to my legs but somewhere along the way it gets lost in translation.

“Elli will you please look at me?” his voice is near desperate so I turn slowly trying to think of what to say now. “You never even said goodbye.”

“Tom I-I didn’t know what to say,” my voice shakes as I speak and I hate it.

“A simple explanation would have been a good start. I get it that you had no interest in me romantically, but damn it Elli we were friends!”

“You think that’s what it was about? That I didn’t have interest in you? That what, you didn’t mean as much to me as I did to you? You were my best friend Tom!”

“Well you sure had a funny way of showing it!” I don’t have a chance to respond as Tom stalks away leaving me a shaking mass of uncontrollable emotions.

 

**_~XX~_ **

 

Sleep eluded me thanks to the confrontation with Tom and because of it I find myself passing the hours I should be asleep with filling out inventory orders and debating on whether or not I can afford to make a few upgrades in the kitchen at the shop; but with my every task I get done I find myself looking at the stack of old letters on the bookshelf.

It was the words written there that kept me going for so long; hours of writing and talking that propelled me through high school and early adulthood and look where I am now. Alone at two a.m. trudging through inventory and wishing I could be anywhere but here.

I pick up my phone to text Miya hoping that maybe she’ll be awake and willing to come and keep me company, maybe even indulge in a little wine and ice cream, but a knock sounds on the door making me jump.

Angling myself behind the door I lay my hand on the bat kept there for protection, and peeking through the peep hole my heart gives a startled thump in my chest as I pull open the door.

“Tom, what are you doing here?” the words are out of my mouth as I open the door wide enough to bathe him in light.

“I couldn’t sleep,” Tom says his eyes searching my face as he talks, and the guilt that shines in them stirs something in me.

“You should come in, I think it’s time we talk.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovelies,
> 
> First and foremost a huge thank you to those who took the time to read, comment, and drop a kudo for me, seriously they all made my day, and I'm sorry I haven't responded in the comments like I usually do, things have just been crazy hectic lately! I hope that this chapter doesn't disappoint!
> 
> Much love and squishy hugs,
> 
> EM
> 
> p.s. oh-twhiddleston-my-twhiddleston.tumblr.com (come get to know me, lets be friends!)
> 
> Music Muse(s)
> 
> My Heart Is Open-Maroon Five & Gwen Stefani


	4. An Uncomfortable Truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tom and Elli talk about what happened all those years ago and Elli comes clean about what happened the morning after...
> 
> *TRIGGER WARNING!*
> 
> This chapter does contain mention of domestic abuse so please if this is triggering for you do not read!

_“Sometimes the truth hurts.”-Unknown._

****

****

The silence is thick as I sit across from Tom and I can’t help but notice how out of place the polished professor look’s in my small living room. I study every move he makes no matter how small. The way he runs the fingers of his right hand over his lips, the quick clench and release of his jaw, his eyes trailing over the pictures on the mantle of my fireplace.

“She really is beautiful,” Tom’s words finally breaks up the silence.

“Luci’s the best thing that ever happened to me,” I murmur as the smile comes easy to my lips.

“Is she…” his voice shakes slightly as his words trail off as he meets my gaze.

“Is she yours?” I finish the thought for him and he nods fingers clenching tight in his lap. “Tom do you think that if she was your daughter that I would have kept it from you this long?”

“Well I surely never thought we’d go from talking every day to not at all, so surely you can see why I’d have to ask…” his voice is cool and I know that I deserve it.

“Did you come all the way over here at two in the morning to pick a fight Tom or did you want to talk like civilized adults?” I ask matching his anger with a lick of my own.

“I don’t want to fight with you Elli, I just want to understand,” the anger is gone from his voice and because I understand where he’s coming from I know that it’s time to face what I’ve tried so long to forget.

**_-XX-_ **

_This birthday has to be the worst birthdays in the history of all birthdays. Not only did the weather take a turn for the worst and dump an unexpected two feet of snow on New York, but both Rachel and Mel have come down with the stomach flu and what’s worse Graham has plans that he just absolutely can’t get out of._

_Of course Callie is trying to make it better, insisting that no amount of snow, stomach flu, or flaking boyfriend should stop me from getting absolutely plastered because after all in her words, it isn’t every day you turn twenty one. So as much as I want to just change into my most comfortable pajamas, order an ungodly amount of Chinese, and catch up with the latest episode of Grey’s Anatomy, I find myself wearing my cutest dress, hair and makeup done just right, awaiting a taxi to take me to the bar._

_My phone chimes from inside of my clutch and pulling it out I can’t help but smile when I see Tom’s name on my screen._

_‘In town would love to meet up. Let me know. X-Tom’_

_My heart does a quick flutter in my chest as I read the words from my best friend. I find his number and hit call waiting patiently for him to answer._

_“Elli, Happy Birthday love!” Tom’s voice flows through the phone._

_“You remembered,” I murmur and for a moment that makes me incredibly sad. How is it that my best friend whom I’ve never seen in person save for a few video chats and swapped pictures can remember my birthday and yet the boyfriend I share an apartment with doesn’t?_

_“How could I forget?” he asks happily, “I’ll understand if you have plans already but if you can I’d love to see you.”_

_“I’d like that,” I say and as I head downstairs for the taxi that awaits me I rattle of the address for him to meet me. Looks like my birthday won’t be so bad after all._

_“So wait, this guy, Tom is his name?” Callie asks pitching her voice over the loud music that plays around us, and I nod taking a careful sip from the brightly colored martini that she was insistent that I order. “So it’s just a coincidence that he’s come all the way here from London for a little vacation on your birthday? I don’t buy it Elli, I think he did it on purpose. You’ve been talking to him for how long now?”_

_“Almost six years…” I say finding the contents of my glass suddenly very interesting._

_“He’s got a thing for you.”_

_“Shut up Callie! It isn’t like that. He’s my best friend. That’s it….” My words trail off as I catch sight of Tom from across the bar. He’s so tall, so much taller than I imagined. His hair is golden curls as he searches the crowd and the moment his eyes meet mine he smiles almost blindingly as he pushes his way through the crowd towards me, and in a matter of moments I’m in his arms and he’s spinning me in a circle._

_“Happy birthday beautiful,” Tom says pressing a kiss to my cheek. “You look lovely.”_

_“So how long are you and Ben in town?” Callie asks once we’re settled in a corner booth._

_“Just until Monday unfortunately,” Tom says smiling at me from across the booth. “Will Graham be joining us later?”_

_“That ass? No he has other plans…”Callie says and with a quick look she drops her gaze to her glass._

_“Well then, we’ll just have to have fun without him. Come on Elli, let’s dance.” Before I can decline Tom has me by the hand pulling me onto the dance floor._

_I wake slowly and groan closing my eyes tight against the light that streams in through the curtains and the bed beside me shifts slightly and turning my head my eyes are filled with the sight of Tom. He sleeps soundly and for a moment I smile before the memory from the night before comes flooding back. I sit up slowly clutching the sheet to my naked chest and all I want to do is cry._

_I made such a big mistake. What was I thinking? And I can’t blame it on being drunk because I wasn’t all that drunk once we made it back to Tom’s room. I am a horrible person. I wince when I think about what I’m going to say to Graham. How am I going to tell him? I slip from the bed holding my breath so as to not make too much noise. I’m just not at all prepared for an awkward morning after talk. I dress as quickly as I can and with a final look around I slip from the room and pray that I can make it home to shower and change before work._

_I let myself into the apartment and turn to lock the door behind me._

_“Have fun last night?”_

**_-XX-_ **

_The tears slide down my cheek as Graham rages around the apartment. I deserve it of course. It was my fault. I try my hardest not to wince when he sends another one of my picture frames sailing through the air to shatter against the wall._

_“How could you be so stupid…so ungrateful!”_

_“I’m sorry…”_

_“You’re sorry? Does sorry take back the fact that you spread your legs for another man?”_

_I thought I did the right thing. I thought telling the truth was the only option that I had but if I had known that this is what would have happened I would have tried to keep it a secret. My cheek stings from the backhand and I know it’s going to bruise…everything is going to bruise._

_A knock sounds on the door and Graham composes himself so quickly that it makes my head spin, and with a single withering look I slip into the bedroom. I meet my eyes in the mirror that hangs over the dresser we share and it scares me that I don’t recognize the girl staring back at me._

_“I’m sorry she isn’t home right now,” Graham’s voice floats through the crack in the door._

_“Oh well do you know when she’ll be home,” Tom’s voice fills the air and my heart breaks a little bit more…_

****

 “So you see Tom it was never a matter of me suddenly deciding to not care,” I say brushing at a stray tear that rolls down my face. “I’ve always cared. Always. My situation was just…complicated.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello Lovelies,
> 
> A HUGE thank you to all of my wonderful readers for all of your support and your sweet words of encouragement, each and every one of them mean the world to me! I know that this is slow going but I promise that it will be picking up in pace in the next couple of chapters! And I know that this chapter is on the shorter side so I'm sorry about that.
> 
> Much love and Squishy Hugs,
> 
> Em
> 
> p.s love-the-tragically-beautiful.tumblr.com (New URL same blog I promise! Come get to know me, let's be friends! Oh and in the corner of my blog under the menu is a link to my Spotify profile where you will find my playlists as well as my LYLM (love you, love me) playlist for those who are interested!)
> 
> Music Muse(s)
> 
> Flowers For A Ghost-Thriving Ivory


	5. Sometimes the Past Comes Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another blast from the past threatens everything that Elli loves and holds dear.

_“Some things are better left to the past…”-Unknown._

**_-XX-_ **

 

Almost a week has passed since the night spent talking to Tom. A week with no word from him, not so much as a glance my way as he makes his way to the beach for his usual morning run; and I’m starting to worry. I shouldn’t even be thinking about it or him, I have too much going on with the music festival coming up but I can’t get him out of my mind, not even a little bit.

“Momma look at my picture,” Luci’s voice is bright as she bounces at the counter seat waving a picture through the air but all I can make out is a blur of colors. I gently take her hand to look at it and smile when I see that she’s drawn herself as princess of a castle with Lolli her faithful purple hippo friend beaming down from a tall tower.

“It’s very pretty, I’m going to hang it right on the board,” I say brushing a kiss to her soft hair.

“I’ll do it, I’ll do it!” Luci scrambles down from the bar and with my help I lift her so she can use a pin to fasten her latest art work on the board for all to see. “Can we get ice cream?”

“Ice cream?” I ask tickling her tummy, “I can’t leave to get ice cream right now lady bug.”

“That is a very pretty picture,” Tom’s voice rolls from behind us and settling Luci on my hip I turn to him.

“Thank you,” Luci’s voice is soft as she smiles at him happily.

“You are very welcome,” Tom offers reaching out to brush a finger down her cheek drawing a giggle from her lips.

“I want ice cream,” Luci declares loudly before I can so much as say hello to Tom.

“Hmm it’s funny you should mention ice cream as I was about to have some myself, so why don’t I treat the two prettiest girls of Northwick to some,” he offers sending Luci into a fit of laughter and happiness as she claps her hands excitedly.

“I wish that we could but I really can’t leave, I’m the only one in today,” I say putting Luci down and she promptly gravitates to Tom dancing in circles around him.

“Momma please, pretty, pretty please!”

“Luci I’m sorry…”

“Let me take her,” Tom offers nonchalantly lifting Luci so that she can snuggle against his chest and something stirs in me, her hazel eyes staring up at me an angel smile flirting with her lips. “What do you say Luci, will you go on a date with me?”

“A date?” Luci’s voice is a gasp as her eyes grow wide and my heart melts just a little bit.

“Well okay, the ice cream place is just…”

“Two doors down, I know. We won’t be gone long Mum, I promise,” Tom says smiling at me and with Luci still on his hip I watch them walk away.

 

**-Tom-**

  _ **  
**_

He had gone in with every intention to just say hello to Elli and see how she was doing and here he finds himself being enchanted by Luci who eats her ice cream sundae happily across from him little legs swinging back and forth sending the untied laces of her pink shoes flying. She chatters on about Lolli who he’s deciphered is her stuffed hippo friend she insisted had to have a booster seat just like her.

“Well what do we have here?” a warm voice calls from somewhere behind them and turning he finds Tessa making her way over.

“Nana, we’re on a date!” Luci’s sweet voice chimes through the air.

“Isn’t that sweet,” she says pressing a kiss to Luci’s head. “You’re just the man I was looking for Tom. The music festival starts tonight and we’re short a few strong men to help set up some of the booths.”

“Well once I’m finished here with Miss. Luci I would be more than happy to help,” he offers earning a grin from the older woman.

“I knew I could count on you. Now I will leave you two to your date. You be sure to have my lady bug home before bedtime mister, and lady bug you be sure to be the very sweetest lady bug in the whole world.”

“I promise,” Luci giggles and with a small wave Tessa’s moving like a whirlwind through the door. “Oopsie.” Luci’s giggle draws Tom’s attention away from the door and he can’t help the burst of laughter that rolls out of him as he sees that Lolli’s face is painted with ice cream. “Lolli wanted a bite.”

“It looks like she rather enjoyed that bite. What’s that Lolli, you want another one? Well if you insist,” and because Luci’s laugh is like music to his ears Tom’s resigns himself to sacrificing the remainder of his chocolate cone to the purple plush animal.

 

**_::Elli::_ **

****

I study the checklist I made for the festival preparations as the crowd has stayed thin for most of the day, and with Luci off on her first _‘date’_ it’s going quicker than I had imagined it would.

“She sure is pretty.”

My heart plummets into my stomach and I turn slowly coming face to face with the last person I had expected to ever see in Northwick.

“Graham?” my voice shakes as I look at him. He hasn’t changed much over the years, save for the look of distinguished businessman that’s replaced his once young and reckless appeal. His eyes are the same deep blue I remember, and his hair, while now carefully styled, is the same rich brown. “What are you-what are you doing here?”

“I was in the neighborhood,” he murmurs sarcastically as he brushes his fingers over a barstool before settling right down. “Come now El, why else do you think I’m here. I want to see the kid.”

“You can’t,” I say as fear melts away to fierce protection. “You’ve had nearly six years to be a part of her life, you don’t get to just come strolling back in now.”

“Ooo, look who’s grown a back bone. Come now Elliana you know as well as I do that I have every right to her.”

“You gave up those rights years ago you remember? You kicked me out and told me you wanted nothing to do with us, in fact if I remember correctly your exact words were that you’d be damned if you were going to raise another man’s bastard.”

“Well things have changed. Look I’ll be in town for a few days, I’m staying at the nicest place this little hole has to offer. Bring the kid by or I’ll be forced to get lawyers involved and we all know you can’t afford that.” Graham’s voice drips with condescension as he jots down a room number on a napkin and slides it across the glossy bar.

I watch as he lazily strolls out and pressing a shaking hand to my stomach I worry I’m going to be sick and the only thought that breaks through the haze filling my head is to find Luci. Get to Luci. Protect Luci. My fingers feel big and clumsy as I try to untie my apron.

I rush around the counter but before I can make it to the door it opens and Dad strides in the smile on his face quickly fading.

“Whoa where’s the fire?” He asks catching me by the arm.

“I have to go, I have to get to Luci…”

“Slow down, where is she? Did she have a seizure?” Dad’s voice is laced with worry as I shake my head but I can’t get any words out as my chest grows tighter by the second. “I have to go, I have to...” my head spins viciously when as if on cue the door opens and Tom and Luci stroll in hand in hand.

“Luci!” my voice comes out more forcibly than I intend and because her lips starts to tremor thanks to my tone, I swing her into my arms raining kisses to her hair. “Oh baby I’m sorry I didn’t mean to scare you. Mommy just missed you.”

“Is everything okay? I’m sorry we were gone longer than I had intended we got a bit messy,” Tom’s voice is ripe with genuine concern but all I can do is shake my head as tears begin to course down my cheeks.

“Okay Luci how about you do some coloring so the grown up’s can talk,” Dad says taking Luci from me. I press shaking fingers to my lips as Dad sets Luci up at the counter with her coloring kit.

“Elli,” Tom’s hand brushes my shoulder and because I need it so desperately I turn into his arms and press my face to his chest.

**_-XX-_ **

 

“Where is he staying?” Dad’s voice is dangerously low as he looks at me from across the booth.

“Dad no,” I murmur shaking my head as I cover his hand with mine. “He’s just trying to scare me.”

“That’s the point. I never got to turn him inside out once I found out he put his hands on my little girl but now he’s messing with not just you but my granddaughter too. I won’t stand for it Elli, I won’t.” There is a pang of guilt inside of me as I see the flash of anger fill his eyes.

“I appreciate that Daddy, I do, but I have to be smart about this. I have to get a lawyer…”

“We’ll help with that,” Tessa says from beside me her hand gripping mine tight. “And I don’t want any lip about it either Elliana. We’re family and family sticks, through and through.”

“Thank you, both of you. I don’t know what I would do without you both,” I murmur as I watch Luci and Tom, their heads pressed close together over a coloring book, the breath hitching in my chest. “I can’t lose her…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovelies!
> 
> I just want to say a huge thank you to everyone for your continued support of me and my story. Seriously, I know that I say it every chapter but just have to because the continual support means so much to me. Thank you for the kind words either here or on tumblr, thank you for the kudos, and for bookmarking my work, it makes my heart incredibly happy!
> 
> Much love and squishy hugs,
> 
> EM.
> 
> P.S. love-the-tragically-beautiful.tumblr.com (same old blog brand new url, don't be shy, come say hi & lets be friends!)
> 
> Music Muse(s)
> 
> Sadly there wasn't one for this chapter it just kind of flowed out while I watched Friends on Netflix :)


	6. Lost Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It seems that Tom and Elli are on the road to recovering their friendship when an incident at the festival weekend throws their world for a loop.

_“Lost time is never found again.”-Benjamin Franklin_

****

****

The anxiety fills me as I make my way to the festival, my eyes trained to Luci who walks happily with Tessa. I can’t help the fear. I worry that at any second Graham is going to come swooping in out of nowhere and snatch Luci away from me.

“Relax,” Miya’s voice is soft as she links her arm with mine. “That little girl has so many eyes watching out for her, you have nothing to worry about.”

“I know it’s just…you didn’t see him Miya. He looked so…smug, like he already knows that he’s won.”

“He hasn’t won shit. You are the very best Momma and that little girls wants for nothing, so please just try to have some fun tonight. And look at Tom he looks just…”

“Miya he is your professor, remember,” I murmur laughing when she rolls her eyes at me.

“Doesn’t mean I can’t look, and there is plenty to look at,” she laughs as she talks and I can’t help but be swept up in it.

Miya’s right of course I shouldn’t be worrying so much. Luci does have a lot of people looking out for her, some of the very best people in the world; but a Momma’s heart can’t help it.

 

The festival is well underway and because I’m swept up in the excitement I’ve managed to push the thought of Graham out of my head. Mostly. I smile at a sweet older couple who chatter away at the booth trying to decide on what to eat when my eye catches Tom who stands just a few feet away deep in discussion with a group of college student, one of which is Miya who’s laughter rolls up and over the air.

“He seems to be settling in just fine,” Tessa says as she comes up beside me wrapping an arm around my waist.

“Well you do make it easy for everyone to feel welcome,” I say pressing a kiss to her cheek.

“As much as I would love to take credit for it I think a lot of it has to do with you, and Luci. He sure has a way with her,” she says motioning to the way Luci launches herself at Tom and he catches her easily swinging her about to draw a giggle from her lips.

“I haven’t done anything…sure we cleared the air some but honestly we haven’t really talked…” I admit as I start up another batch of funnel cake.

“Maybe you should do something about that.”

“I want to. I didn’t realize how much I missed him until he came back into my life, I just, I don’t know how,” it feels good to admit it out loud.

“Leave that to me. Miya!” Tessa calls out but before I can ask her what she’s planning on doing she’s fluttering away.

 

“I am under strict orders from Tessa to relieve you of your duties so you can enjoy the festival with Luci and a certain hottie professor,” Miya announces as she bounces into the booth and capitalizing on the fact that my hands are full she unties my apron for me. “Go, get. Have some fun.”

“Miya come on, I have work to do,” I say laughing as she starts pushing me out.

“No you have fun to have. Do you want to deal with Tessa?”

“Fine I’m going,” I shake my head as I relent. “Do you know where I can find my lady bug?”

“My best guess would be right over there,” she points into the crowd and following her direction I see Luci riding on Tom’s shoulders.

 

“Momma, look what Tom won for me! A new friend for Lolli! His name is Tom,” Luci shakes a stuffed turtle at me and I can’t help but smile.

“Did you say thank you?” I ask once Tom’s let her down and in answer she nods furiously.

“She did indeed,” Tom says beaming down at her. “Are you done for the night?”

“Looks like it. Tessa’s got it in her head that I need to have some fun, so Luci what do you want to do?”

“Merry go round, merry go round!”

“That sounds wonderful! What do you say Tom, fancy a spin?” I can tell that I’ve caught him off guard but he’s quick recover as he smiles at me.

“I would love one. Let’s go Miss. Luci, Elli,” he extends a hand to Luci and once her hand is in his he offers me his other hand and after a moment of hesitation, I take it.

**_-XX-_ **

 

“You made her night you know,” I say snagging a piece of Tom’s fluffy cotton candy. “Luci is smitten.”

“The feeling is very mutual,” Tom says smiling after Luci who walks ahead of us with Dad and Tessa.

“You made my night too,” I say stopping to look up at him. “I know we haven’t really talked since that night but I wanted you to know that I’ve missed you, I didn’t realize how much until I saw you again, and I know things won’t be the way they were before…”

“Elli, I’ve missed you too,” he says brushing a lock of my hair from my forehead. “We have a lot of time to catch up on and I don’t know about you but I’m looking forward to it.”

“The fireworks are going to start soon,” I murmur and when I turn to look at the shoreline Tom’s hand takes mine and we watch as the first bursts of color light up the night sky.

 

My eyes drift from the sky to look at Luci who I know is a huge fan of fireworks only she isn’t standing with my Dad and Tessa.

“Luci?” I call out pulling my hand from Tom’s. “Luci?”

“What’s wrong?” Tom asks and I feel my chest start to tighten.

“Luci!” I call out as I run to where Dad and Tessa stand. “Where is Luci?”

“Honey she’s right here…oh my…Luci!” Tessa’s voice raises wildly as I search the groups of people standing around us.

“She was right here Elli, just a minute ago. She probably went to stand with Miya,” Dad says and I know he’s trying to keep me calm. I ignore him as I take off to search Miya out and when I see here I feel a small glimmer of hope.

“Miya,” I grab her arm turning her towards me, “is Luci with you?”

“No the last I saw she was with your Dad and Tessa…Elli what’s wrong.”

“She’s not with them…she’s not here…” my throat thickens as the world rocks around me. I can’t think as I tear across the sand calling my daughter’s name as I try to clamp down on the panic. I hear echoes of Luci’s name coming from Dad, Tessa, Miya, and Tom but it does very little to comfort me. I turn a slow circle once I make it to the game booths hoping that maybe she was attracted to the shiny lights and prizes but there is no sign of her.

“Elli!” Tom catches me by the shoulders as I start to weep. “We’re going to find her.”

“Where is she Tom? Where is my little girl?” I press a hand to my head as I search the throngs of people filtering in off the beach, and then I see her. She’s standing at the far end of the line of booths talking to someone, and because I recognize the flashy watch on the wrist of the man who reaches out to touch her hair I take off at a run.

“LUCI!” I scream her name as I lift her up and because the fury rises in me before I can contain it I’m passing her off to Tom as he reaches us before anyone else can.

“What in the hell do you think you are doing?” I demand as Graham rises slowly to his feet and his eyes, cold and calculating, pierce through me.

“I just wanted to say hello to my daughter.”

“I told you to stay the hell away from her. You don’t get to come back just because you feel like it. You don’t get to disrupt our lives, and you certainly do not get to lure my daughter away!”

“If I were you son, I’d walk away, now,” Dad’s words ripple through the air as he stands beside me. For a second Graham measures him up and I worry he might be stupid enough to try something but the flash of anger dulls and gives away to smug arrogance.

“There was no harm done here, but you can be assured that my lawyer will be in touch. You won’t keep her from me…”

“Watch me,” I spit as he retreats. Once he’s out of sight I feel myself start to shake and because I need to for my own sake I gather Luci close and hold on for dear life.

 

 

**_-Tom-_ **

 

He busies himself in Elli’s kitchen preparing tea, partly because he feels tea can fix just about everything but mostly to keep himself steady. He’s known fear but anything before tonight pales in comparison.

“She’s asleep,” Elli’s voice sounds from behind him and as he turns he wishes he knew what he could do to clear the worry from her eyes. “I see you found my tea stash.”

“If anyone would find it, it would be me,” he offers with a smile as he presses a mug into her hand, but when he finds her hands still tremble he keeps his over hers. “Breathe Elli, she’s safe and sound tucked up in her bed.”

“I know,” Elli’s eyes close tight, “I just keep imagining…what if I hadn’t gotten to her when I did? He could have easily walked off with her and no one would have noticed because of how crowded it was…”

“But he didn’t. You found her, and I know as well as anyone else does that you will always find your girl. Graham has no idea what he’s up against…”

“That’s just it, when I see him, I feel like I did back then. I feel scared, and isolated, and weak…” it tears at him when her voice breaks and what he would give to press a kiss to her forehead to smooth away the lines of worry etching her skin.

“You aren’t alone Elli. You and Luci both have an incredible support system. Lean on that,” he murmurs against her hair as she presses her head to his chest, and though he doesn’t say it out loud he already knows he’s counts himself one of those many people willing to support them.

 

::Elli::

 

I find myself bitter on the Monday following the music festival. I used to love the festival weekend. The excitement, the crowds, but he ruined it. I keep a careful eye on Luci as Miya and a few volunteers help pack things back into the shop.

“It was one heck of a turn out this year,” Miya says as she catches the bottle of water I toss to her. “Sorry you missed the end. How’s lady bug holding up?”

“She’s just fine….me on the other hand.”

“I wasn’t going to say anything but you look like…” I hold up my hand effectively silencing her.

“If you value your life or your job you will not finish that sentence.”

“Okay, how about this? I’ll come over tonight, cook dinner. Once we get lady bug in bed we can have some wine and just chat,” she offers and because it sounds simply amazing to me I am all too happy to take her up on it.

 

 

Luci’s hand is tight in mine as we make our way to the front door of our house and I stop short when I see the bouquet of flowers on the porch. I lift them and read the card. _‘Making up for lost time,’_ is penned neatly and I can’t help the smile as I bury my face in the blooms.

“Pretty flowers Momma, who are they from?” Luci asks as I let her into the house and kicking the door closed behind us I toss the keys on the small square table near the front door.

“I think they are from Tom, but it doesn’t say sweetie. Why don’t you go take your shoes off, Miya will be here soon for girls night.”

“Okay,” Luci says streaking away to her bedroom and because the flowers call for it I give them another smell before making my way into the kitchen to hunt up a vase. I start my IPod letting the music fill the kitchen as I take my time arranging the flowers and when they are just right I settle them in the middle of the table.

_‘Thanks for the flowers.’_ I send off a text to Tom and setting the phone aside I start the dinner prep so not as much needs to be done once Miya makes it over and with the sound of Luci playing her favorite DVD, The Princess and the Frog for the millionth time, my phone chimes. The smile is instinctive as Tom’s name flashes on the screen and I open the text.

_‘What flowers?’_ and my stomach drops.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovelies!
> 
> Look at that two chapters in one night, it won't be a habit but when it flows it flows and I will embrace it! A huge thank you to all of my wonderful supporters, each of you mean the world to me.
> 
> Much love and squishy hugs,
> 
> Em.
> 
> p.s. love-the-tragically-beautiful.tumblr.com (same blog, new url, come say hi and lets be friends!)
> 
> Music Muse(s)
> 
> None for this chapter either =/ I'm starting to sense a pattern so hey if anyone who reads this has a song or something that reminds them of this story please don't be shy and let me know in a comment either here or on tumblr!


	7. Signals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Elli wonders if she's reading the signals the right way.
> 
> *Warning*
> 
> This chapter contains mention of alcohol consumption.

_“Who knew that signals could be so hard to read?”-Unknown._

****

****

I wake to the sound of my phone vibrating across my nightstand and when I finally manage to pick it up it takes everything inside of me not to curse whoever it is that’s calling me at two in the morning.

“This better be good,” my words are a harsh whisper when I answer. “What? You have got to be kidding me. I’ll be there in five minutes.”

**_-XX-_ **

“You had no right!” My voice is loud as I let Tom into the shop. He stays quiet as I pull him to a barstool and because his silence irritates me almost as much as his late night boxing match with Graham has my words come out harsher than intended. “Sit down.”

“Where’s Luci?” Tom asks as I circle around the counter and pull the first aid kit down, and despite my anger my heart warms a little over the fact that he would think to ask after my little girl.

“At home with Miya, we were having a girl’s night remember?” My tone softens as I take stock of the damage. A shallow cut dances above his left eyebrow and his bottom lip sports an impressive gash. “Damn it Tom what were you thinking?”

“I was thinking that somebody needed to tell him to back the hell off,” he hisses through his teeth as I dab at his eyebrow. "Shit."

“From the look of your face I would say not much telling got done,” I murmur as I lean in a little closer to see just how deep the gash is.

“I wasn’t going to just stand by as he overstepped boundaries with you and Luci.” He winces as I brush antiseptic over the wound. “Jesus that burns.”

“You deserve it,” I say lightly shaking my head. “I appreciate what you were trying to do for us Tom, but in case you haven’t noticed I’m a grown woman and I’m more than capable of looking out for me and mine.”

“Believe me,” his words are careful as I press gauze to his lip, “I’ve noticed.”

“It doesn’t look like you’ll need stitches,” I say as I take a step back but before I can fully retreat Tom’s hand is circling my wrist.

“I want to kiss you,” his words are careful as he brushes a finger to my lip. “I’ve wanted to kiss you from the moment I laid eyes on you again.”

“Tom…” his name is a whisper as he cups my face in his hands and I grip his wrists as my heart hammers against my ribs.

“I won’t, not yet, because when I do, there will not be a single thought of Graham in your head. I’m sorry I dragged you out of bed but thank you for patching me up.” He brushes a soft kiss to my forehead before leaving me to stand utterly perplexed by what just happened. “Good night, Elli.”

**-XX-**

“He said that?” Miya asks as she sits at the counter drinking coffee. “That is just so…romantic. I knew he’d be a romantic!”

“Miya,” I whisper her name as I motion with my head to the customers who linger in the shop.

“Oops. Oh I meant to tell you. Mary over at the Inn where _you-know-who_ was staying told me that he checked out first thing this morning, sporting not one, but two black eyes.” I won’t deny the small surge of satisfaction that courses through me but I hide it as I wipe down the counter.

“As satisfying as that may be to hear I don’t think it’s over yet, which is why I’m being proactive,” I prop myself on the counter. “Dad got in touch with an old friend from college who’s a lawyer. Well he’s my lawyer now I guess. Anyways, he’s coming down from Seattle in a few days so we can start to work some things out. He said from the little that Dad’s filled him in on I have a good case for sole custody.”

“Oh Elli that’s good news!” Miya dances around the counter and hugs me tight. “We need to celebrate!”

 

 

When Miya said we needed to celebrate I thought she was going to suggest dinner out, maybe a movie, instead I find myself scouring my closet for a dress worthy of a night of dancing and “adult” fun as Miya put it in her text.

“Are you going to just keep staring or are you going to pick something?” Tessa’s voice filters in from my bedroom door and with a sigh I turn to look at her.

“I have nothing to wear,” I grumble as I shake wet hair from my shoulders.

“Hmm, let me see,” Tessa brushes past me her hands busily working as she pushes clothes around on their hangers. “How about this?” She holds up a high low dress in minty green.

“I don’t know Tessa, I haven’t worn that in ages…”

“That’s because I can’t get you out of jeans and t-shirts most days. You deserve a night of fun, and what’s more fun than a little dress up huh?”

“It’s just going to be a quick drink really, I know Miya wants to go dancing and all that but I don’t know…”

“What is there to know? You and Miya are going to go paint the town red while your dad and I have a backyard campout with Luci.”

“Are you sure?”

“Absolutely,” she says laying the dress out on the bed before pressing a soft kiss to my cheek. She makes her way to the door and gives a final look over her shoulder. “You wear that dress Elli, and you have your night of fun.”

 

I hardly recognize the reflection staring back at me in the mirror. My hair is curled and flowing free over my shoulders the dress Tessa picked out clinging to my curves, and I worry for just a moment that maybe it’s a little too much.

“Knock, knock,” Miya calls out from down the hall and taking a final deep breath I gather my clutch and make sure I have everything I need. “Wow…look at you.” I give a quick spin and smile at her nervously.

“Too much?” I ask but she shakes her head before wrapping me in a tight hug,

“No! I just don’t think I’ve ever seen you in anything other than…”

“Jeans and t-shirt?” I finish for her and she laughs nodding her head.

“We better get going, the boys will be waiting.”

“The boys? What boys?” My question goes unanswered as Miya takes my hand and leads me out of the house.

 

  **-XX-**

 

The music thrums loudly in The Tap House and I find myself getting swept up in it. Of course it could be the alcohol swimming through my system that has my inhibitions lowering.

“I have another shot for you!” Miya calls over the music and I shake my head but it doesn’t stop her from pressing the glass into my hand.

“Miya I really shouldn’t!”

“Are you driving?”

“No.”

“Are you going home to Luci?”

“No.”

“Then drink!” She urges me and throwing caution to the wind I knock the shot back. “Oh, he’s here.”

“Who’s here?” I ask and I follow her gaze. Tom stands out in the crowd, partially due to his height, but mostly because of how he looks. He’s gorgeous. Drop dead, smack me in the face gorgeous. He wears a simple black shirt and a pair of jeans, and it shouldn’t look so good on him but my God, it does. “Miya what did you do?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about…” Miya feigns innocence but before I can press her for more details Tom’s in front of us.

“Miya,” Tom says nodding towards her, “Elli. You look, amazing.”

“Thank you, so do you,” I say feeling the heat that crawls up my neck to bloom into my face.

“And there is my date, I will leave you two alone,” Miya says happily and with a quick wink she gathers her bag and disappears into the crowd.

“Let me buy you a drink,” Tom offers and because I can’t think of single reason why he shouldn’t I just smile.

 

**-XX-**

“I can’t believe Miya asked you out, even if it was on my behalf,” I giggle as I unlock the front door of my house.

“She’s something,” Tom says on a chuckle as I let him inside and flip on the light.

“She means no harm really,” I say tossing my keys onto the table and I step out of my shoes sighing happily as my feet are freed from the heels. “She just has it in her head that you and I are….”

“That you and I are what?” he asks at length and I shrug a shoulder as I head for the kitchen.

“Tea?” I ask taking the kettle from the stove.

“I wouldn’t say no, and you are avoiding the question,” he says making himself at home at my kitchen table.

“You caught that did you?” I ask and he smiles knowingly. “She has this idea that we’re some great love story in waiting. Two people who were once best friends lose contact and then suddenly find one another again after years, sparks fly, yada-yada-yada. It’s sweet really, but it’s hard to explain to her that while it would make for an amazing chick flick it just isn’t how real life works.” I turn from the stove and find Tom standing close behind me.

“Why shouldn’t it be how life works? You have to know Elli…” his words trail off as he brushes the hair from my face. “You have to know how I feel.”

“Tom…”

“Please, just let me…” his voice is hoarse as he dips his head towards mine and my eyes flutter closed as his lips brush against mine. His taste is an intriguing mix of mint and liquor and I find myself sinking into it and him. A hum slips from the back of my throat as he deepens the kiss and I’m suddenly aware of everything around me. The feel of the kitchen sink cold against my back, the tingles that Tom’s fingers cause as they scrape tenderly against my scalp, the way his heart pounds against my hand as I lay it against his chest.

The air drags in and out of my chest as he pulls away and I smile rubbing my fingers over my lips.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have, I’m taking advantage…” he says taking a careful step back but I hold onto his shirt keeping him close. “How drunk are you?”

“Drunk enough to not get behind the wheel of a car, sober enough to know I want to do this,” I admit. My heart hammers hard against my chest as his eyes scan over me and the haze in his eyes has me worried that maybe I’ve read the signals all wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my lovelies,
> 
> Thank you for all the love and support, it means the world to me. I hope this chapter doesn't disappoint. Let me know what you think! Oh and it was brought to my attention that for some reason it has been doubling up my notes at the end so it has both my new tumblr url and my old one, I'm trying to figure it out!
> 
> Much love and squishy hugs,
> 
> EM
> 
> p.s love-the-tragically-beautiful.tumblr.com (come and say hi to me, lets be friends.)


	8. Stay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Elli and Tom share a night together and as Elli tries to come to terms with what it all can mean someone is determined to make her life hell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING!!!!
> 
> This chapter contains sexual content! **TRIGGER WARNING** This chapter contains scenes of violence, if this is triggering for you, please, please, please DO NOT READ!!!!!

_"Not really sure how to feel about it, Something in the way you move, Makes me feel like I can't live without you, It takes me all the way, I want you to stay, stay”- Stay by Rhianna Ft. Mikky Ekko_

****

**_-XX-_ **

****

My stomach somersaults with nerves as I stand across from Tom in my tiny bedroom. He is impossibly beautiful as he stares at me, and the breath hitches in my chest involuntarily as he takes a step towards me. I concentrate on his movements. I can’t help it. Everything about him is mesmerizing, especially in the dancing light that the candles I insisted on lighting give off.

His touch is feather light as his fingers trail down my face, dipping in the hollow of my throat, and when he smiles I have to wonder if he felt the sudden kick of my pulse.

“I haven’t done this in a while…” I murmur hoping my voice doesn’t shake, too much anyway.

“We’ll take it slow, I’m in no hurry, are you?” Tom asks as he twirls a lock of my hair around his fingers.

“N-no,” I stammer as he starts pressing kisses to my face, his head dipping low causing my head to fall back. His lips cruise over my throat and I shiver, remembering how much I love when that particular spot is kissed. Obviously he hasn’t as he takes his time tasting my skin.

“I wasn’t going to rush you,” he murmurs, and I watch him as he starts to slide the zipper slowly down my back, his fingers lighting a fire under my skin as they go. “I was going to wait as long as it took.” My dress falls down my arms slipping like a whisper until it pools at my feet, and I see the heat flash in his eyes. “I am so glad the wait wasn’t long.” I draw him into me, desperate for his taste to dance on my lips again and he obliges, for a time before breaking away only for a moment to pull his shirt over his head. My hands dive into his hair as his mouth is feverish on mine.

My hands explore greedily, soaking up the sensation with my fingers. Reveling in the way bumps rise under his skin in response to the scraping of my nails, his jaw clenching tight the closer I move to the waistband of his jeans, and I’m drunk off of the feeling it gives me to know that I can provoke this sort of response from him. I work the button free but before I can dip my hands inside he’s nudging me back until the back of my knees bump against the bed. With one hand he unhooks my bra gliding the straps down my shoulders until finally he pulls it completely away.

I feel incredibly vulnerable under his heated gaze and as I raise my arms to cover myself he cups my hands in his and gently pushes me so that I’m on my back staring up at him. He looks incredible with his hair mussed from my hands and he smiles down at me as he trails a finger slowly over the curve of my breast my back arching when he circles around my nipple. It pebbles under the flick of his tongue and I moan eyes rolling as a spear of desire flashes hot through me.

My body heats when he drops to his knees nudging my legs open a little further fingers hooking in my panties and he doesn’t break eye contact as he pulls them slowly down my hips, lips following close behind them. He fixes his mouth to me and sends my heart rate skyrocketing.

I’m lost in sensation as his tongue methodically laps at me and I can do little more than try to keep up, but I can’t. My hands clench and unclench the covers as a sob ripples through my lips, and as I lay quaking in the aftershocks of my orgasm I’m vaguely aware of his movements. He stands and I try to make him out but my eyes blur and lose focus and then he’s over me, his knee nudging my legs open again, and he strokes his hard length against me drawing a sharp intake of breath as he sinks inside.

“Oh,” I murmur before pressing my lips to his throat. He sets the pace; slow and torturous as he hitches my leg over his hip driving impossibly deep.

**-Tom-**

“Elli…” her name is a whispered plea in the dark as he moves inside of her. He’s drawing on all the control he has wanting to take his time, the need in him to watch her rise up and up and up running almost as deep as the need for his own release.

He’s utterly captivated by her and because he wants to see her he rolls so that she’s astride him. Her hands press against his chest as she begins to rock against him and it’s enough to have him completely coming undone. Her eyes close as her head falls back and he takes that as an invitation. Pushing himself up he latches his lips to her throat drawing a moan from her that just propels his need further.

Her movements pick up in pace as she tightens around him and he knows he isn’t going to last much longer.

“Let go,” he urges her almost desperately and together they shatter.

 

“I promise I’ll move in a minute,” Elli murmurs against his neck and because he wants her to do no such thing he tightens his hold on her. He loves the feel of her in his arms; the way her heart beats against his chest echoing his own and because he could stay like this forever he’s slightly disappointed when she manages to push herself up enough to look at him. Her eyes are clouded with an endearing sleepy satisfaction. “Tell me you’ll stay tonight.”

“I’m not going anywhere.”

 

::Elli::

 

I turn my face into the warm spray of my shower and give a happy sigh. Every muscle in my body aches in the most delicious of ways and I don’t even mind that I got barely four hours of sleep. I could have slept in because Dad and Tessa are opening the shop today but my body runs off a clock that is near impossible to alter. I hum happily as I turn and opening my eyes I let out a sharp shriek as Tom pulls the shower curtain aside and pops his head inside.

“Jesus you scared me!” I push my wet hair out of my face and find him grinning sheepishly.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t think you’d mind,” he says stepping in. My eyes trail down his body and find that I don’t mind, not at all.

 

  _ **-XX-**_

“How are you even functioning?” Miya sounds miserable as she shuffles around the shop and I shrug my shoulders as I grab a bottle of water and ibuprofen and set it on the counter for her. “You had just as much to drink as I did.”

“I’m sure Tom helped her sober up just fine…” Tessa says in a sing song voice as she comes in from the kitchen with her own personal hang over cure in hand.

“Shut. Up,” Miya says loudly making herself wince as she drops onto a bar stool.

“Tessa! Luci doesn’t need to hear this kind of talk and I’m sure Dad would rather not hear it either,” I say blushing furiously.

“Lucky for you your dad took Luci to the beach, so spill,” Tessa says playfully snapping me with a towel.

“What is there to say?”

“What is there to say she says? There must be a lot to say since I spied him giving you one heck of a good bye kiss this morning.”

“He did not,” Miya says a smile splitting her face.

“He did, and Miss. What-Is-There-To-Say here had the dreamy eyes when she all but fluttered in here,” Tessa says and I groan rolling my eyes to the ceiling.

“It was nothing…” I say but give a quick shake of my head, “Okay it was something. It was a lot of something, but please, I don’t want to make a big deal out of this.”

“I knew it, I just knew you two would end up together!” Miya says smugly.

“Miya no, we aren’t together, we aren’t going to be together, we are just two adults who had one amazing night of sex,” I say trying to suppress the sudden spurt of panic that bubbles up inside of me.

“Honey you know I love you,” Tessa says as her hands come down on my shoulders, her eyes dancing with humor, “so please understand that it is because of the love I have for you that I say this. The look on your face says that it is much more than sex and to say otherwise is just…stupid.”

**-XX-**

_‘Can I see you tonight?’_ I read the text from Tom and the smile is slow as I tap my response.

_‘I don’t know…Luci starts school tomorrow…and don’t you start classes too?’_

_‘I’d really like to see you Elli…I promise I’ll go home before curfew.’ I laugh and shake my head._

_‘I’ll have Luci in bed by 8:30…and I wouldn’t mind some company for my night time cup of tea, Professor.’_

_‘I wouldn’t miss it for the world. See you at 8:35.’_

 

**-XX-**

 

I slip out of Luci’s room glancing back and smiling at the picture that she makes curled on her side a tight grip on Lolli. She’s the sunshine of my life and tomorrow she starts the adventure that is Kindergarten. My heart aches a little, okay a lot at the thought but according to Dad and Tessa and just about everyone else I’ve spoken to about it that is to be expected.

The house is quiet and because I know it will be a little while before I can completely unwind I make my way to the living room but halfway there I hear the tapping on the front door and glancing at the clock I see that it reads eight thirty-five. Have to give it to the Professor, he sure is punctual, and with a smile I pull open the door.

My heart plummets as I stare at Graham. He looks angry, the bruising around both his eyes darkening his eyes in a menacing way.

“What are you doing here?” I demand softly situating myself in the crack of the door.

“I’m here to take what’s mine,” Graham hisses spitefully but there’s something in his voice that terrifies me. I clamp down on my fear and decide the best thing to do is to just close and lock the door but as I go to push it shut he bumps it with his shoulder sending me back a couple of steps, and shutting the door behind him, he flips the lock. “It’s time we had a little talk.”

 

 

I move slowly keeping my eyes trained to Graham’s face.

“Some place you have here Elliana,” Graham’s voice drips with sarcasm. “Where’s the kid?”

“She’s in bed. She starts kindergarten tomorrow.”

“Then you’ll want to keep your voice down,” he says and before I can react he slaps me, my head snapping back. My head rings from it and I bite down on my lip telling myself to keep quiet. I will be damned if I scream for him. “That’s for sending your English lap dog after me.”

“I had nothing to do with that,” I say and the next blow glances off of my temple sending me to the floor.

“Don’t you lie to me!” Graham roars but his anger buys me time. I manage to get to my feet and when I do I grab my phone and run. I pray that because I know the house better than he does that I can get to through the back door. All I can think to do is get him out of the house and away from Luci and as I run I press my speed dial and lifting the phone to my ear I pray for an answer.

“Elli?” Dad’s voice is deep in my ear but before I can respond I’m hit from behind. The phone flips across my lawn and I reach for it but Graham pulls me back.

“Help!” I scream and finally anger outweighs the fear. I kick and scratch and the adrenaline is what has his answering blows going nearly unfelt.

“You are going to listen to me!” Graham says pinning me down. “Unless you want me to go in and wake up Luci.” I instantly go still panting as I stare up at him. He looks half-crazy as he licks his lips greedily. “I could give you and the kid a life you can only dream of now, but you just don’t get it. You’ll understand now. I’ll make you get it.”

Siren’s pierce the night air causing Graham to move his head and when he does I take my chance. I bring my knee up slamming it into his groin and when he lets out a short oomph I’m able to roll out from under him.

“Momma?” Luci’s voice calls from the back door and with a strength I didn’t know I had I run and pick her up swinging her into the house and slam the door behind us. I set her down and flip the lock behind me.

“I need you to go to my room and lock the door, okay? And you don’t open it for anyone unless it’s me,” I order her but she stalls when Graham starts slamming on the door behind us. “Go Luci! Now!” Her little feet carry her out of the kitchen as I press my back tightly to the door determined to keep him out, but almost as suddenly as the pounding started it stops. I squeeze my eyes shut as the breath tears in and out of me but I can’t bring myself to move.

“Elli? Luci!” my dad’s voice bellows through the air and my eyes flash open but before I can call out to him his large frame is filling the door way. “Oh my God.”

“Dad?” the word trembles from my lips as I try to get to my feet and in a few strides he’s in front of me gathering me close. “I knew you’d come.”

 

**-Tom-**

He hates being late and checking his phone as he walks he sees that Elli has yet to text him back. He hopes with everything in him that she isn’t angry, he had every intention of being there right on time he just didn’t expect the dinner with the dean to go so long. Tucking the phone in the back pocket of his jeans he looks up his movement stopping when he’s bathed in the flashing lights of the police cars and ambulance parked outside of Elli’s house.

Fear floods through his bewilderment and before he knows what he’s doing he’s running.

“Whoa, you can’t go in there,” an officer stops him catching his arm before he can go through the front door.

“You don’t understand this is my…” he trails off as he doesn’t really know what to refer to Elli as.

“Tom?” Tessa’s voice calls from the front door, “Mason Young you let him go. He’s family. Come on Tom I know Elli will be happy to see you.” Tessa marches over and takes his hand and with a hard glare for the officer who stopped him she pulls Tom inside.

“What’s going on Tessa, what’s happened?” any rational thought he has simply slips away when he sees Elli sitting in a chair at the kitchen table a paramedic flashing a pen light in an already swelling eye. His throat constricts as he steps closer.

“Tom!” Luci’s voice breaks up the static in his head and turning he finds her in the arms of her grandpa. She holds her arms out to him and he takes her hugging her close.

“Mommy got hurt,” Luci sniffles against his shoulder and because the questions are overwhelming he draws some comfort by offering some to the little girl who shakes in his arms.

“I’m okay baby,” Elli says brushing at the paramedic working on her.

“Does she need a hospital?” Mitchell asks from beside Tom and Elli’s eyes widen even as she shakes her head.

“I don’t think that will be necessary. She has some bruising and a few cuts but nothing that needs stitches,” the paramedic says as he pulls off his gloves. “She probably shouldn’t be alone tonight.”

“She won’t be alone,” the words are out of Tom’s mouth so fast that it surprises even him. “I’ll stay.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello Lovelies,
> 
> Thank you for the love, seriously it brightens my day. I want to apologize for this chapter, I personaly don't feel like it was my best. I am not that great at writing anything smutty (this is somewhat of a personal challenge for me and I am trying desperately to get better at it.) So if it wasn't that great I will fully understand anyone's discontent with it.
> 
> Much love & squishy hugs,
> 
> EM
> 
> p.s. love-the-tragically-beautiful.tumblr.com (come get to know me, lets be friends!)
> 
> Music Muse(s)
> 
> Skin by Rhianna (for the smutty scene)  
> Stay by Rhianna feat. Mikky Ekko (for the very end)
> 
> Nothing for the middle.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello Lovelies,
> 
> So there we have it. Chapter one of Love You, Love me. I hope that any who take the time to read enjoys it. As always I am open to all comments so don't be afraid to leave one or drop a kudo my way.
> 
> Much love,
> 
> EM
> 
> p.s come visit me at oh-twhiddleston-my-twhiddleston.tumblr.com (don't be shy, say hi, lets be friends)
> 
> Music Muse(s)
> 
> And Then You-Greg Laswell


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